Welcome to Class 82 of “The Ramp” to the Highway of Success course for young men. I am Daniel Whyte III, chairman of the National Association to Save Young Black Men in partnership with the Martin Luther King Senior Institute for Young Men & Young Women. The Institute aims to honor the legacy of Martin Luther King Sr., commonly referred to as “Daddy King”, whom God used to raise the great leader, Martin Luther King Jr. Our purpose is to guide young men and young women, and help them get on the path to becoming kings and queens for the glory of God.
I am your instructor for this course and the author of the ESSENCE national bestselling book “Letters to Young Black Men”. We are using that book as the text and its study guide to guide you through the course. The study guide was developed with the help of Jamie McCallum (M.Div, Truett Theological Seminary), Charles Garrett (M.Div, Southwestern Theological Seminary), and now my youngest son Danyel Ezekiel Whyte who is in his third year of college. This course is for all young men, but especially for young black men and young men of color who oftentimes have a “difficult journey” in this great country called America. I call this class “the Ramp” to the Highway of Success because my goal is to get you on “the Ramp”. As a man, you ought to be able to make it from there. Out of respect for you as a young man, my job is to get you on the ramp and point you in the right direction, not to tell you all the details once you get onto the highway of success. With God, you can do great things.
— Let’s Pray —
This lesson is titled “On Your Relationship With Your Wife or Wife-to-Be, Part 2.”
Someone once said, “Nothing makes a marriage rust like distrust.”
Here are six important things that you must do to insure a happy marriage:
1. Pray, and under the Lord’s leading, take the time to choose a good woman to be your wife. A bad woman can and will make your life miserable.
2. Refuse the notion that marriage must become a drudgery.
3. Make the choice to love your wife. Your wife will not look her best all of the time; love her anyway. She may not feel her best all of the time; love her anyway. She may not say the best things all of the time; make the choice to love her anyway. Believe it or not, love is a choice and not a feeling.
4. Avoid bitterness. Do not allow yourself to live a life of bitterness. Bitterness and strife will only make you, your wife, and your children miserable, and your marriage will probably end in divorce because of it. We are told in Ephesians 4:26, 27 and 31: “Be ye angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath: Neither give place to the devil.” “Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice.” It’s quite all right to show some anger in order to let your wife know that you are serious about some things—just do not sin in the process.
5. Be the head of your family. Do not buy into the modern philosophy of making the woman the head, or giving her the same authority as the husband. Listen, friend, God wants you to be the head of your family. If you are a man at all, in your heart of hearts you want to be the head of your family. Believe it or not, your wife, in her heart of hearts, wants you to be the head of the family, and even your children want you to be the head. So, be the leader of your family. Have confidence in the God that leads you and in yourself, and have confidence that the decisions you make under God’s leadership are right for your family and for others. Dear brother, one of the biggest reasons why the African-American community is in the shape that it is in today, is because women run the home and much of everything else. Don’t be a part of continuing this negative side of our heritage.
6. Seek God’s guidance each day. Pray this prayer daily: “Lord, lead me, guide me and direct me through this day in all I and my family do. Help me to make wise decisions.” Your marriage can be a great blessing to you if you have the courage enough to follow God’s leadership and be the head of your household.
In closing, Tony Dungy, the first black coach to win the Super Bowl and the host of NBC’s Sunday Night Football said, “You are never going to get anywhere in sports or in life until you become convinced of the truth of the gospel of Jesus Christ. You may become a professional athlete or have fame and nice cars and nice houses and a lot of money, but what you’ll find is that all of that stuff goes away pretty quickly. You have to understand that Christ died for our sins, and that He died not just to be our Savior but so that He could be the center of our lives.”
Now, like many of you, I grew up in a very religious and church-going family, and during that time, I often heard the phrase “Being Saved.” Now, much of what the church people I grew up around said “being saved” was back then especially, in my community, is wrong according to the Bible. I wrote an article about it titled “On ‘Being Saved’ in Black America” which is available for you to read free of charge on our website, gospellightsociety.com. Right now, I want to share with you very briefly what the Bible says “being saved” really is.
First, understand that you need to be saved because you are a sinner. Romans 3:23 says, “For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God.”
Second, understand that a horrible punishment — eternal Hell — awaits those who are not saved. In Matthew 25:41, Jesus Christ said that God will say to those who are not saved, “depart from me ye cursed into everlasting fire prepared for the devil and his angels.”
Third, realize that God loves you very much and wants to save you from Hell. John 3:16 says, “For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life.”
If you want to be saved from Hell and be guaranteed a home in Heaven, simply believe in Jesus Christ, that He died, was buried, and rose from the dead for your sins, and then call upon Him in prayer and ask Him to save your soul. And believe me, He will.
Romans 10:9-13 says, “That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised Him from the dead, thou shalt be saved. For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.” That is the most important decision you will ever make.
If the Lord tarries His Coming and we live, I’ll see you for our next class.