Confessions of a Hotel Maid
Plagues Do Not Come Without a Reason
by Daniel Whyte III with Meriqua Whyte
Brenda Mosey’s Story
The Guidance and Counseling class at the Thomasville Christian High School on Thursday with the eleventh and twelfth graders went well.
“I’m so glad you can be a part of our staff here,” the principal, Karen Chimaugua, said to Bianca as the students were filing out of the room. “As you can tell from some of the things some of the students have shared with us, the devil is attacking even our children. We have a lot to pray for even if we only prayed for our children.”
“We sure do,” Bianca said. “That devil is not going to let up. We have to pray hard and fight hard for our children to be delivered from his onslaught.”
“We sure do,” Karen said. Looking around, she noticed Brenda Mosey sitting at the back of the classroom. “Is everything alright with you, Brenda?”
“Yes, Mrs. Chimaugua. I was just waiting to speak with Dr. Bianca,” Brenda said.
Karen looked at Bianca who smiled, and said, “I’ll give you a call later.”
“Okay. I won’t hold you any longer. Have a good evening, Dr. Bianca,” Karen said. “Have a good evening, Brenda. Tell your mom and dad I say hello.”
After the principal left the room, Bianca closed the door. She sat at the desk next to the one at which Brenda was sitting.
“Okay, Brenda, what’s going on? Before you begin talking let me remind you that what you shared with me over the phone last Friday I am under no obligation to keep it quiet. For right now, until I hear all your story, I’ll hold everything in confidence. No one knows about what you shared with me except for my husband, but as you already know we work together. He came here with me twice, I believe, and he spoke with the boys. I don’t know if you remember him.”
“Yes. I remember him,” Brenda said. “I’m okay with him.”
“You shared with me that you were involved sexually with your boyfriend who is in college and that your parents know nothing about your relationship with him. How old are you and how old is he and what’s his name? How long have you both been seeing each other?”
“His name is Brax Jamison and he’s twenty-two. I’m seventeen. We’ve been seeing each other since I was sixteen years old. He’s getting ready to graduate with his bachelors degree in chemical engineering. He says he’s going to be making a lot of money and he’s going to buy him a big house. Right now he lives in his own apartment. He also says as soon as I turn eighteen he’s going to take me away to live with him. I like being with him, but I feel kind of weird not letting my parents know about us.”
“Why haven’t you told them?”
“Because when I started high school, my dad told me that if he ever hears of me having a boyfriend or even talking about having one he was going to kill me. He also said that if I ever got pregnant before I got married not only was he going to kill me, but he was going to kill whoever the father is. My mother, she’s just out of touch with what’s going on in my life.”
“What’s your explanation for doing something they explicitly told you they do not want you to do?”
“I don’t know,” Brenda said shrugging her shoulders. “I don’t see why they should care what I do as they pretty much leave me to myself anyway. Although I love being with Brax, I feel guilty at the same time because I feel like I’m living a lie behind my parents’ back, but then again, they don’t really care what I do, so I don’t even know why I waste time worrying about what they think. They are too busy working and hardly have time for me and my sister. We hardly ever eat dinner together, much less breakfast. It’s everyone for themself each morning. If they are not at work, they are always at the church doing something. They really don’t even talk to me. Sometimes I feel like I’m being a bother to them, and if they don’t want to be bothered with me, I certainly don’t want to be bothered with them.”
“Do you believe your parents love you?”
Brenda shrugged her shoulders. “If they do, they sure don’t show it.”
“Do you believe Brax loves you?”
“He tells me he does. We see each other every weekend. We meet up at the mall and we go places—to the movies, to his apartment, to the park, sometimes we just drive around, or we may go out of town. I’ve even spent a few nights at his apartment. I tell my parents I’m staying at a friend’s house. They may call me on my cell to check on me, and, of course, I tell them all is well. If they ask to speak with my friend’s parents Brax gets on the phone and pretends to be my friend’s father. He’ll say the mother is busy. Stuff like that. Everything is super with Brax. He’ll buy me stuff. He keeps telling me how much he loves me and if I love him I’ll be available for him.” Brenda then looked away. “Lately, he’s been getting a bit controlling telling me where I can go or cannot go and who I should talk to. I don’t know why the change.”
“Have you ever gotten pregnant from your involvement with Brax?” Bianca asked.
Brenda hesitated to answer.
“You have to tell me everything if you want me to help you,” Bianca said.
“Well, the first time we did it, I got pregnant . . . and, I had an abortion. He kind of insisted on it saying we weren’t ready for a child and being that I was under-aged that would create a big problem. He paid for the abortion. I thought I was doing the right thing; after all, as Brax pointed out to me, we were not married, yet. I just haven’t been the same since the abortion. I have been living a nightmare ever since. Of course, no one knows about it but Brax and myself. ”
Bianca listened as Brenda finished her story. Her heart ached for Brenda, a teenager who had the world before her, but who was about to mess it all up. She could see the pain in Brenda’s eyes and hear it in her voice.
Bianca stopped by Karen Chimaugua’s office after speaking with Brenda to take a look at Brenda’s school records. “She shared some personal things she’s going through. I told her I would keep everything confidential,” Bianca told Karen.
After thumbing through Brenda’s records, Bianca said, “She has all ‘A’s’ and ‘B’s’. With all that she’s shared with me, I felt for sure she would have low grades.”
“Troubled students have grades from one end of the spectrum to the other. Some have low grades; others seem to overcompensate and are able to keep high grades; others just maintain,” Karen said. “That’s why we handle each student as an individual and not as a group.”
“Things are weighing heavily on her heart,” Bianca said as she handed the file back to Karen. “She’s been carrying her problems for some months now. I hope it won’t begin to affect her grades. I’m going to do all I can to help her get through what she’s going through. Please pray hard for her and her family.”
“I will,” Karen said.
* * * * *
“She’s a smart girl,” Bianca shared with her husband. “She even suggested that maybe you can talk with her father first after I told her the best thing she can do is to tell her parents and stop living a lie before them, and, of course, for her own peace of mind.”
“You bet I will,” Franklin said. “I’ll stop by tomorrow evening on my way back from my meeting across town, if that’s not too early.”
“Tomorrow’s too early. I’ll let you know when,” Bianca said.
“I had a hard time getting her to step outside of her situation and view it as an outsider would. I shared with her how she was risking her health if she continued having sex with Brax. When I asked her did she feel in her spirit that Brax was having sex with other girls, she got upset saying Brax was not that kind of guy. I then asked her why she thinks he is now being controlling toward her. She couldn’t answer, so I told her to think about it and to let me know her thoughts next Thursday. She’s agreed to meet with me again. I also mentioned that since Brax led her into having an abortion what would she do if she were to get pregnant again. I told her to think about it in light of the fact that the first abortion was in her own words a living nightmare.”
“Sometimes I wish we would all just learn from the mistakes of other people,” Franklin said. “Life would be so much easier for us.”
“From what she’s told me, she has no real social life at all; she feels closed in especially lately with Brax increasing his control on her, and then on top of that, living a lie before her parents which is eating her up on the inside. Brax has insisted that she does not tell her parents.”
“Is she a Christian?” Franklin asked.
“That’s the good news. She shared with me that her mother was getting on her case one day and out of frustration demanded that she pray and ask Jesus to save her saying that’s her only hope to being the daughter she should be. To get her mother off her back she prayed, but she says she did not mean it, so she knows she’s not a Christian,” Bianca said. “I witnessed to her and she asked Jesus to come into her heart and save her. So she’s now on the right path. I asked her if she believes her parents are living out their Christianity. This is what she told me: ‘Dr. Bianca, all I know is whatever Christianity they have, it doesn’t seem to be helping them. They don’t act like real Christians. They argue quite a bit. They seem cold and distant to each other, and, of course, cold and distant to me and my sister. I don’t even feel like I’m a part of the family.’”
“How many times have we heard that coming from the children of Christian families we’ve counseled,” Franklin said.
“That is so sad,” Bianca said. “Christian parents are failing to be the example to their children of how a Christian should live. This is what I told Brenda: You know what God expects of you. I appreciate your being honest with me and telling me you were not saved. I know it’s hard, but just because your parents are not living right that does not mean you should not live right. After a certain age God holds you accountable for every thing that you do, and you are past that age. We don’t always do right as Christians, but thank God He is a forgiving God. He’ll forgive you for all the wrong that you have done. But God cannot help you until you realize you need help and then allow Him to help you. You can’t base your Christianity on how your parents live. She said she understood and that she agreed. I told her that you and I would talk with her parents and try to get the entire family to come in for family counseling. I need to speak with Brenda for one more session before we involve the parents. I asked her to read Psalm 139 every morning when she wakes up and every night before she goes to sleep. As far as her relationship with Brax, we’ll see what direction to head in with that once we make the initial contact with her parents.”
“Sounds good to me,” Franklin said. “Now, does Brax claim to be a Christian?”
“You know, I didn’t even ask her,” Bianca said. “Right now, I’m trying to keep the focus on her and help her get settled in her spirit. She’s unstable right now.”
“Okay,” Franklin said. “When are you going to begin your research on the new book? I believe I have the ideal title for it: Confessions of a Hotel Maid: Looking at Infidelity from a Psychological Viewpoint. What do you think about that?”
Bianca laughed. “Sounds like the title of a romance novel. But as I think about it, this next book could have a different twist to it. We could write it like a novel and intertwine biblical teachings on marriage and relationships in-between the stories that the maids will share with us. I don’t want it to be just a dry study.”
“I see,” Franklin said.
“I guess I better begin reading up on how to write a novel,” Bianca said. “I’m ready to call it a day. Do you know what I’d like right now? A big bowl of butter pecan ice cream.”
“I’m going to begin gathering information on Monday,” Bianca said as they enjoyed their butter pecan ice cream. “I’m not sure what my take-away will be. One question that’s uppermost in my mind, though, is: Why hotel maids?”
“That’s a good angle to approach it from,” Franklin said. “Why hotel maids? You gave two viable reasons earlier on.”
“Those were my guesses. But there’s only one way to find out,” Bianca said. “Hotel maids, here I come.”
Bianca pulled into the parking lot of Thomasville Inn and Suites around ten on Monday morning. As she was stepping through the main entrance leading into the lobby, Ann Luxley was walking across the lobby floor with a few boxes of Kleenex.in her hands.
“Good morning,” Bianca said cheerfully. “Excuse me, ma’am. Do you have a minute?”
“Sure, how can I help you?” Ann asked as she stopped to acknowledge Bianca.
“I just wanted to ask you one question,” Bianca said.
“Sure,” Ann replied.
“Don’t be surprised at the question, but my husband and I are Christian counselors and we’re doing research for a new book that we are writing together,” Bianca said. “The question is: Do men, Christian men in particular, ever try to come on to you during their stay here?”
Ann took a step back.
“I warned you not to be surprised,” Bianca said with a smile. “Don’t worry. Any information you share with me will be confidential. The only person who will have access to whatever information you share with me will be my husband, who, as I mentioned, will be working with me on the book.”
“Why are you even asking me that question and exactly who are you?” Ann asked.
“Please forgive me. I should have told you more about myself,” Bianca said. “Let me give you my card and a brochure about our counseling ministry.” As she reached into her pocketbook to take out her card and brochure which she handed to Ann, she continued speaking. “I’m Bianca Patel, and my husband Franklin and I are Christian family counselors. My husband is also a retired pastor. Our office is located here in town. We have written several books together on family issues. The question, what percentage of male guests, Christian male guests, in particular, hit on hotel maids during their stay at the hotel? This has been on my mind for some time now, so I decided to do some research and see what we come up with. We plan on putting the results in a book. This is where you and your co-workers come in. We plan on speaking with hotel maids at various hotels to see what insight they could offer us on how these men approached them, why these men approached them, what words did they use to try to engage them, conversations that may have taken place, and did the maids do anything to spur them on. Things like that.”
“I see,” Ann said, relaxing some. “It’s interesting that you should come by today asking that question.”
“Why is that?”
“Two of my co-workers and I were talking about this this past week. Hopefully, we will be getting together again this evening to talk some more on it,” Ann said. “One of my co-workers who just started working here a few months back was approached by one of our guests. She was highly upset, so we decided to meet up and share stories with her so she won’t be naive as to the ways of men, and so that she will be prepared if and when another may approach her. She’s from another country so she’s not used to this.”
“How interesting. Do you mind if I join you?” Bianca asked.
“I’ll have to check with the others first because they may not feel comfortable with an outsider present,” Ann said, “especially if you’re going to put the results in a book.”
“You can tell them everything will be held confidential; names will be changed including the names of the hotels and the cities they are located in. No one will know it’s you at all,” Bianca said.
“I have your card. I’ll give you a call around one o’clock,” Ann said.
“Please do, and thanks for your time,” Bianca said, extending her hand. “I’m going to talk with your manager to let him know about the research and secure permission from him to meet on the hotel’s property.”
Bianca stopped off at a few more hotels in the area and randomly posed the same question with other hotel maids before returning to her office.
* * * * * *
“It seems like this is becoming an epidemic,” Bianca reported to her husband later that evening. “I believe we definitely have something worth pursuing. I randomly spoke with about twenty-five hotel maids and all of them with the exception of four testify that Christian men, including pastors, have brazenly propositioned them, without any shame at all. What I am gathering from the random interviews is, these men do not want a long-term relationship; they just want a quick sex-only tryst. And as many of those ladies shared with me, they have no interest whatsoever in having a secretive relationship with these men, whether it’s a one time fling or an on-going relationship.”
“They probably don’t want to risk losing their job if word was to get around that they were involved with any of the guests as that is against hotel policy,” her husband said.
“Mmm. Maybe. But I believe it’s more than just that,” Bianca said. “I believe people tend to see hotel maids as needy women without class or morals. Generally speaking, people tend to frown at those who do maid-type work. They see them as illiterate and lacking the smarts and wisdom to get a so-called ‘decent job.’ Men see them as naive and easy prey.”
“I know you haven’t gotten into the meat of the research yet, but in speaking with the twenty-five, have you found that to be the case?” her husband asked.
“Of course not. Those who I talked with spoke intelligently. They take great pride in their work. One of the maids told me she was offended that a man, a complete stranger at that, would even dare approach her in that way. In her own words: ‘What kind of a woman does he think I am!’”
Franklin nodded his head thoughtfully. “You could also interview the managers to find out their policy as far as how much interaction their employees are allowed to have with their guests,” he said. “It would be great to get a copy of their employee handbook.”
“Yes. I plan on doing that,” Bianca said. “Now, I was thinking to add more content and to get some of our questions answered by the guilty, namely pastors and church leaders, how about you randomly send out letters to pastors and church leaders all over the country letting them know who you are and sharing with them what we are doing. See if any who fit into that group would be willing to share his story. We could send a list of questions to them, ask them to answer the questions truthfully, and of course, let them know all will be held in confidence. They don’t even have to give us their names or location. Just answer the questions and tell us their story, including how things are in their marriage, and specifically what led them to break their marriage vows.”
“I’ll get on it right away,” Franklin said.