WATCH: John Gray Says He Was Never Suicidal But Had Suicidal Thoughts, Criticizes Church for Not ‘Concealing’ His Adultery

John Gray said he is not suicidal, despite numerous published reports (Credit: Relentless Church // EEW Magazine)

After a video of Bishop T.D. Jakes telling a weeping Pastor John Gray “the spirit of suicide hangs around your house,” many prayed for that suicidal spirit to be lifted from the Relentless Church leader.

But now Gray is telling everyone, not so fast. They wrongly assessed the situation, and he never was actually suicidal in the first place.

In a new sermon at his Greenville, SC church, the preacher who has been under scrutiny for admitting to cheating on his wife, Aventer Gray, said, “I saw people—bless their hearts—online talking about, Pastor John talked about suicide. I didn’t say that I went and got a gun. I didn’t say I bought pills. I said the enemy put thoughts in my mind, and people tried to make that like I was out of my mind.”

He’s disputing that assumption.

The headlines about the OWN reality TV star’s suicidal ideations began after Gray ministered during a revival at First Baptist Church of Glenarden. While preaching, he said, “I literally thought about how I could end my life and still get to Heaven and somehow my kids would not be scarred, but there was no way I could figure out how to do it.”

He also confessed, “I wanted to call it quits.”

Those statements sent off alarm bells, mobilized prayer warriors, and sent his story flying around the Internet at warp speed. But the 45-year-old is hoping to clear up some misconceptions.

“Here’s the truth: you can be so hurt and so wounded that you would rather not breathe, and go see Jesus, because that’s a real thing,” he told congregants. “And you know what’s funny? It wasn’t devils that made me feel that way; it was people.”

According to Gray’s clarification and modification of his previous statements, the thoughts of suicide were planted by Satan, but caused by people.

In the sermon titled “Graveyard Shift,” Gray preached while in actual chains, and made pointed remarks directed toward those who question his salvation after infidelity. “What does my failure have to do with the blood of Jesus? That’s why I need the blood,” he said.

The husband and father also criticized people for digging up the sordid details of his sin and said the Godly thing to do is to just keep quiet.

“The Bible says, ‘It’s the glory of God to conceal a matter,’” said Gray, quoting Proverbs 25:2.

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SOURCE: EEW Magazine, Paul Mason