Doug Munton: How to Teach Your Kids Not to Follow Christ

O’FALLON, Ill. (BP) — Christian parents, are you looking for some easy suggestions on how to help your children grow up to be heathens?

Interested in helping them slide down the path to moral relativism and depravity? Needing some tips on ways to lead them to be lukewarm Christians at best? You have come to the right place!

Here are some simple tips on how to teach your children not to follow Christ:

1. Skip church at the drop of a hat.

Make sports and other activities more important than worshiping the Almighty. Attend church only if it is convenient. Let them stay at home on Sunday mornings because they are “sick” but then attend events on Sunday afternoons. Never ask them to bother to plan ahead or set an alarm or anything else so dreadful. Don’t let your family dream of attending church if the weather is bad or good — or might be bad or good. If they attend church each week they might learn about God’s plans and actually begin to follow Him. Bonus points if you talk about church attendance as “legalism.”

2. Never read the Bible or pray with them.

You don’t want to risk your kids thinking Bible study and prayer is important so don’t ever do it with them. Remind yourself that spiritual matters are “personal.” Tell yourself they can learn about the Bible at church — unless the weather is bad or good, etc. Don’t let them think spiritual matters are important anywhere outside of church on Sunday mornings. If they catch you praying or reading your Bible or talking about the Lord, they might begin to think Christianity actually matters deeply and eternally. Can you risk that?

3. Live out some blatant hypocrisy in front of them.

Nothing will aid your little ones on their journey into paganism more than some good old-fashioned hypocrisy in their Christian parents. Let your actions contradict your profession of faith. Be sure to fake perfection publicly. Nod politely at church and then gossip and belittle fellow believers on the way home. Don’t forget to talk about the importance of your children doing what you say instead of what you do. And especially remember this: Seeing humble repentance from you could cause irreparable damage to your endeavor to sabotage their faith.

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Source: Baptist Press