At Medi-Share we’re all about creating a sharing community that bears one another’s burdens, and so fulfills the law of Christ (Galatians 6:2). This is never more important than when, as believers, we’re called upon to “mourn with those who mourn” (Romans 12:15). With that in mind, one of our teammates, Dominque “Dom” Robin courageously shares his experience of comforting and finding comfort when he and his wife recently experienced a miscarriage.
Fixing leaky pipes, mowing the lawn, paying bills, sharing the privilege of raising our daughter, catching things that creep and crawl, swooning Sarah with my “dad bod.” These are just a few of the awesome things I get to do as husband and father.
With God’s help, it’s amazing what can happen to a man once marriage and children come along! After five years of marriage and nearly three years of fatherhood, I think I’ve finally found my place.
That was exactly how I felt until Aug. 31, 2018, the day my seemingly perfect world dissolved into what felt like a nightmare. The day my beautiful wife had a miscarriage.
In the book of James, God urges us to consider our trials as pure joy, knowing that our difficult situations will develop faithful perseverance (1:2-3). If we’re honest, trials are not awesome, and I’ve yet to see a pillow with “James 1:2-3” stitched in it.
But if God loves us enough to deal with the topics of pain, tragedy and loss head-on, we need to do the same with each other. While you are welcome to read on, the remainder of this article is written directly to husbands who are struggling to find their place during the difficult times following an unexpected loss of an unborn child, or stillborn infant.
Be Honest with God and People He Brings into Your Life
A few weeks before the miscarriage, doctors discovered a tumor on my left kidney. I remembered thinking the child would be a welcomed distraction in the event the tumor was malignant, and our worst fears came true.
In the first few days after we lost the baby, I was so confused and angry that God would take away the one thing we had to look forward to. In such a gentle way, God used a close friend to remind my wife and me of the everlasting hope we have waiting for us in heaven.
God heard my honest cries for help, and He surrounded our family with people who would lovingly remind us of God’s character, and truths from His Word that brought so much comfort and peace to our aching hearts. Certainly, this is one of the inherent benefits of the church, and why Christians are urged to never “neglect meeting together” (Hebrews 10:25).
Click here to read more.