The Rock Church San Diego lead pastor, Miles McPherson (L) with seven of the moms in his life on Mother’s Day May 8, 2016. The mothers in his life are, seated on the couch (from L-R) are: McPherson’s mother, Margaret “Gigi” McPherson; his wife Debbie, his sister Margaret and his niece Leah. Seat behind the couch (from L-R) are: his daughter-in-laws mother, Karen Shine; his daughter in law Sammie McPherson and his niece, Mallory McPherson.
In an inspirational celebration of Mother’s Day, Miles McPherson, lead pastor of Rock Church in San Diego, California, presented a kaleidoscope of motherhood through the stories of seven mothers in his life on Sunday.
Among them was his 79-year-old mother, Margaret “Gigi” McPherson, who looked a lot like the quintessential supermom after talking about her life as a mother beginning in the 1960s.
“I had five C-sections in seven years. So they were all very close,” she said of McPherson and his siblings.
“When they were in elementary school a typical day would be getting them out of bed … making breakfast, making lunch, taking them to school, going to work for four or five hours ’cause I was a nurse and I worked between all of them. And picking them up from school. Getting them ready for football practice. After I took them there, made dinner and picked them up again from practice. Had dinner, did homework, went to bed and start all over again the next day. And we only had one bathroom,” she said.
She then shared a bit of her background as the product of an interracial marriage between two Jamaican immigrant parents who met in New York City.
“My parents were both born in the British West Indies. And my mom is white, my dad is black. When my mom became a young lady her family decided to send her to New York so she wouldn’t marry one of the Jamaican fellows. But she came to New York and she found one anyway. And they got married in 1935,” she said.
Her mother’s family, she explained, did not approve of the relationship with her father so they were cut off from them.
“My mom’s family didn’t want anything to do with us so I knew nothing about her family. So I would encourage grandparents to share your stories with your grandchildren and let them know about the extended family that they have. It would do a lot for their self-esteem,” she said.
McPherson’s mother also encouraged parents to listen to their children.
“When I was a little girl, the saying was children should be seen and not heard. And I made it a point in my life to not have that with my children and I decided that I wanted to listen to my children and have them talk. So I would encourage you to talk to your children, not at them,” she said.
“If you respect them and start as little children, don’t wait until that time … you know it’s pretty hard. But if you start young and show respect, they will respect you. They will respect themselves. … My Scripture is, pleasant words are like honeycomb, sweetness to the soul and health to the bones,” she added.
McPherson’s wife, Debbie, also shared how being raised in a single-parent household affected her and influenced the way she parents.
“I grew up in New Haven, Connecticut, in a single parent home. My dad left my brother and I when we were very little. My mom was a maid in a motel, she worked seven days a week. She worked really hard just to keep food on the table and clothes on our back. There were many nights when she didn’t eat dinner and we would ask her why and she would say, ‘it’s because I ate earlier.’ … when in reality it was because there wasn’t enough food,” said Debbie.
“She really did sacrifice a lot for my brother and I. My mom was also the only white lady in the neighborhood. My brother and I became the subject of much bullying. We learned how to fight at a very young age just to survive. It was pretty bad to the point where we actually had to have police escorts home from elementary school,” she said.
“Because of how I grew up, we were very poor, we didn’t have a car, bringing groceries home was a difficult task. We would have to pull them home in a field in a carriage and in Connecticut in the winter time it was pretty brutal. This all filled me with a great determination to make my life better. And to get out of that situation. In reality, now I know it was God that was pushing me. It wasn’t me, it was Him. Even before I knew Him his hand was one me. And I’m not gonna cry,” she said, getting emotional.
Debbie explained that by the time she was 16, she was already holding down two jobs while attending school at the same time. She was soon able to save enough money to buy a car and start her journey out of poverty at the age of 19.
“A couple years later met this guy and that’s a whole ‘nother story for another day,” she said, laughing about her husband. “Four years later we got married and immediately started having kids.”
McPherson’s sister, Margaret Diggs, who serves as Rock Church’s design director, said she struggled as a young mother, especially because her husband was a police officer and worked different shifts.
“It was not easy because he had a lot of crazy hours and just like every new family, we struggled to live the way we wanted to live, and pay the bills and get out of debt. And he wasn’t around a lot because he worked so many jobs,” she said.
“I had some bitterness [back] then that I had to work through. And I just want to encourage young moms, single or not, if the other maker of your children is not around, just stay in prayer. Pray for just patience.”
“What I do here is another testament to us with God just being graceful in how we live our lives and how we listen to Him. I do the interior design here and never in a million years would I think that I would be able to use my gifts for the church. If you have a gift that you think may not be impressive or important, just keep on with the gift that God has given you and He’ll help you use it in a great way,” Diggs added.
Pastor McPherson’s niece, Margaret’s daughter Leah Newberry, talked about how God delivered her from a destructive relationship into a healthy marriage.
“I am a new mom. My daughter is 3 months old. … I was in a relationship that was very destructive and God delivered me from that relationship. I decided to continue and get a career in nursing, so I was able to meet my now husband, get engaged, get married, have a baby and then graduate from nursing school. And then once she was here, I took my boards and I’m now employed as a full-time nurse in a local emergency room,” she said.
Karen Shine, the mother of McPherson’s daughter-in-law, also talked about how bad relationships affected her life as a mother.
“I am the Irish-Portuguese lady that ended up in their Christmas card in case any of you are wondering, it was me,” she began.
“I’ve known Pastor Miles and Debbie since 1991. My ex-husband was arrested for a series of crimes. … God sent Pastor Miles. Long story short, he (ex-husband) pled guilty and is serving 56 years,” she said.
“During our marriage I was abused, and the really hard part for me is that I stayed quiet. So as you’re listening to all of our stories, if you have something brooding, brewing, whatever the right word is, shout it to the rooftops ’cause there are a ton of resources here to help you. Please don’t do what I did and stay quiet,” she cautioned.
“As I said, my husband pled guilty to 56 years. At the snap of a hat, I’m a single mom. I went from having a dual income to a single income. I worked over 70 hours a week. I had to take care of this one right here,” she said, pointing to her daughter.
“Fast forward to 2008 and unfortunately, I found myself in another relationship. He also pled guilty … and served five years in prison.”
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SOURCE: The Christian Post – Leonardo Blair
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