After Chasing ‘Drinks, Drugs, and Dangerous Men’, Writer, Lilian Pizzichini, Found Hope in God

Lilian Pizzichini has been in recovery since December 2008
Lilian Pizzichini has been in recovery since December 2008

Brought to her knees by her addiction to drugs and alcohol, the writer Lilian Pizzichini turned to Christianity for salvation

by Lilian Pizzichini

On the morning of 13 December 2008 I woke up to my first day of recovery from drugs and alcohol. I say “woke up”, but it was more a case of “coming around”. When I came round, then, my first thought was of what had taken place the night before.

I had been assaulted after an evening spent chasing drink, drugs and dangerous men in sordid places. The previous 12 months had seen me descending into the chaos of addiction after a lifetime of trying to control and manage my drink- and drug-intake.

In this last year I kept having strange, out-of-body experiences that made me shiver. At one point I was walking past a graveyard on my way to the pub, when I suddenly had the feeling that I could not take another step. It was as though I were walking into the face of a blizzard. There was a force inside me that desperately wanted me to stop. But I couldn’t.

A year or so later I discovered that my great-grandmother was buried in that graveyard. By then I was seeing myself in the faces of street drinkers. I had always been a heavy drinker and occasional drug user. I had been a Soho poseur and done the members’ club scene.

But that wasn’t enough for me. I had to get into the gutter so that my denial could be torn away from me. I had to choke on my pride. Looking back, it seems as though I was being prepared for a glimpse of something divine.

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SOURCE: The Telegraph

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