Have You Had “The Talk” With Your Children Yet?

black mother talking to daughter

I’ll never forget the first “sex talk” I had with our oldest son. “The talk” occurred at my office at the company we owned at the time. It was after hours, when no one was in the office but him and me. It was a very scary moment—for me and him—but I’m glad I did it then.

He had already started to make comments and ask questions that indicated he needed an education. He was about 10 at the time. (I understand that sounds young to some, but it may be old now for others.)

I recognized that helping my children live pure and healthy sexual lives would be a challenge in a culture that is often defined by sex. I wanted to be the primary influencer in their development as adults because I knew no one had a stronger desire for them to make wise choices than me.

I began with a few principles that helped me to continue to have open and honest dialogue with my boys, even in their teenage years and adulthood.

Here are seven suggestions for having the sex talk with your child:

1. Start early. The key here is that you want to be the primary and first source of information for your child. The old saying is true: “If you don’t tell them, someone else will.” You want to make sure they are getting the correct information about sex. With the oldest, it happened when he was about 10 years of age, but with the youngest it was at about 8 years. It will depend on their surroundings at school, the dialogues they are having with you and others, and their maturity level at the time.

2. Share in stages. A 4-year-old needs to know that there are boys and there are girls and they are each different, but that’s about it at that age. Share information based on the child’s interest, maturity and ability to understand. I don’t believe one talk will be enough for most children. Make sure children feel freedom to discuss anything with you as they have concerns or questions.

3. Answer questions. If your child is willing to ask a question, it is because they want an answer. Many parents make the mistake of telling children they don’t need to know something yet. There are no bad questions. Again, they will search for an answer, and the wrong ones are the easiest to find.

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SOURCE: Charisma News
Ron Edmondson

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