A popular pastor that I follow quotes that sex can be considered 3 things, “gross, god, or a gift.” I believe this to be very true in our day, due to how sex is overrated outside of marriage and underrated within marriage.
It is gross to those that have been taught their entire life that sex is bad and will cause people to look at you differently. For some it can be become a god, taking over your time, money, and relationships in order to appease it. But, it is God’s purpose for sex to be seen as a gift. Sex is a gift to be shared with your spouse within the confines of marriage. My wife and I, by the grace of God, were both virgins at the moment of saying, “I Do”, to one another on our wedding day.
Based on our first hand experience, here are 4 benefits of waiting until marriage to have sex.
1. Keeps God at the center of your relationship
Honoring God in our relationship was my wife and I’s supreme goal and saying no to sex made that goal easily accomplish-able. God is the inventor of marriage, which means you need Him in your marriage in order to have a healthy one. The stages before you say “I Do’ are the most crucial for laying a solid foundation for your marriage. Establishing a no sex boundary will keep you focused on the important aspects of a courting relationship. Yes, the desire to have sex will come, but with God, you will be able to have the strength to resist temptation. Trusting God in your relationship will help you to make a confident decision when you feel that person may be the one you desire to marry.
2. You learn how to talk it out before you walk it out
Communication has always been and will always be one of the key components of a healthy relationship. My wife and I had a long distance relationship, so the majority of our time spent before marriage was over Skype or on the phone. It was one of the hardest things I had ever done, but it was so worth it. We really learned each other on so many levels, and when we did see one another the boundaries we had set in place kept us focused on enjoying one another communicatively versus physically. Early sexual satisfaction in a relationship delays you from discovering key areas of the relationship such as the ability to commit, compatibility, and agreement on future goals.
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SOURCE: Black and Married With Kids